Here's the reason I haven't been posting or even doing much other than playing games at Facebook. More on that later.
You say why are you depressed when it's getting warmer, the days are getting longer, and stuffs growing and blooming? Thank you for being so kind to ask :) My answer is because we've had the rainiest, muddiest, dark and dreariest winter ever
Seeing the few daffodils, crocus, and other spring flowers blooming that didn't get damaged by the few days of extreme cold and snowy weather or the really heavy rains we had AFTER stuff was already starting to bloom (thanks bitch Mother Nature!) just isn't helping. Though the cute mini dafs I found yesterday did help a little.
It's so wet and soggy that even walking in grass you need rubber boots because you sink a bit. I have 2 knee high pair and they are the best things I've bought because they keep me from slipping and falling. It's like in most places the grass is almost floating above the mud underneath. All it takes is losing your balance and you find yourself sliding in mud as the grass moves with you. A friend of a friend (yes really, my cousin had it posted on her facebook feed) slid into her car and is now in a boot cast. Personally I've fallen 5 times when I stupidly didn't have my rubber boots in. You'd think I'd learn my lesson after the second time don't you? I've always been that person who always gets hurt someway, usually tripping, sliding out of sandals or clogs, tripping in high heels, or just bumping into things. I learned early when going into a store to keep track of my purse so it doesn't knock things off shelves. And I learned the hard way to be careful at outdoor craft shows because it's SO easy to trip over ropes and stakes put in the ground to hold up the tents and awnings. After doing this twice I'm so careful I tend to stay in the middle of the paths until I see something I really want to look at. I miss some things but it's really for the best. The next time I trip I just might take out the display when I fall.
Just crossing my front yard, which is pretty flat, can mean sliding and falling. I fell twice out there. You'd think having a wet muddy backside and hands would have taught me a lesson the first time. It took falling on my side so that I was wet and muddy from my face to my feet.The back yard is mostly mud since we had work done (again very stupidly) in the late fall. I'm beyond tired of wiping mud off the dogs when they come in. As for my boots, one pair I keep for the muddy yard and the other pair is for when I go out shopping and it's raining. And it seems to rain every 2 or 3 days.
The dark days are just getting to me and with it come the dark thoughts of the s word. This is the way it was last year when I slid into a depression so heavy I had suicide planned out. Reading isn't helping as much this year. Maybe I just haven't found a series to take my mind of the darkness. So I've retreated back into facebook games. It's gotten so bad I started a fake sign-in so I can play both of the games I like longer.
So if I don't post for a while it's most likely because I'm spending time playing games to keep my mind off just how sad I can get.
